Aug 28, 2011

Sunday Haiku


Haiku :  Safe And Sound

The essence of trust,

Folded in my heart of hearts,

Smile, it’s bullet-proof.



This  is my attempt to translate my Haiku to Spanish.

It is losing its 5-7-5 syllables, of course.

This is just to see whether it makes sense or not when  translated to another language.




Haiku : Sano Y Salvo

La esencia de la confianza,

Dablado en mi corazŏn de corazones,

Sonrisa, que es a prueba de balas.



I’m calling anyone who knows Spanish to help me correct the mistakes in the above

translation. Suggestions welcome to improve it to a more meaningful poem. Thank you in

advance.



Gracias. J












Love Haiku,

Balqis

Aug 28th ‘11

Sunday


Image :  gigistar.deviantart.com

8 comments:

  1. So beautiful! My knowledge of Spanish is pretty basic so I won't try to correct you because it looks good to me.

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  2. Thanks a lot, Andreea. Appreciate your comments so much.

    My knowledge in Spanish is very shallow. :)

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  3. This is beautiful and for the Spanish I know I think it is fine but I'm not a native speaker.

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  4. Nice doing, BB

    You are expanding your horizons.

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  5. @Ana - Thank you so much. It's nice to know that it's fine! I'm writing the direct translation which might means a little bit different from the one in English. Anyway, there's no harm in trying. :)

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  6. @Od - Thanks a lot. What I wrote is very raw. Anyway, I'll try to improve and write a more meaningful poem - what I mean is be able to express more poetically. Appreciate your comment so much. :)

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  7. I'm reading this like:

    Trust is in Essence-
    My heart folded into hearts,
    Smile- it's in safe house!

    Can't help in Spanish- so.. :):)

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  8. Omo, that's nice! I'll accept it. :)
    Thank you for writing another version of it.
    Can't help, too, writing in direct translation!
    Thank you so much. :)

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