You Will Forever Be In Our Hearts

A year had gone by but sweet and loving memories linger on. As if it was only yesterday. Everything is still vivid - his voice, his jokes, his patience and his love for everyone. There are times we feel that he is still around. The fond thought of him will make mom teary-eyed. I could understand why for she was the one who gave unconditional love and care for him since the first day he came to this world till the last day he left for another world. Mom would sacrifice anything just to be with him, giving her utmost attention and care and attended to his every need. Though it had taken a toll on mom's health, she pushed every other thing aside and gave priority to him; with the prayers and hope that the support she gave would make things better.  Everyone else in the family was doing the same thing for him.

"Mom, I'm in deep pain." That was what he said to my mom who was always by his bedside. This rang through my ears right to my heart, as if piercing it. I felt as if my heart suddenly stopped beating for I could not even bear to hear that.  Everyone of us felt the very pain he went through and everyone would console him and tell him to be patient facing the critical moment. If only the word "patience" could do miracle, it would have healed his critical illness. Medicines had been like staple food that had to be taken everyday and in large amount. That had made him feel nauseated and lost appetite. Everyone of us would ask him anything he would like to eat and by all means would look for it.

For two years he was battling with the critical illness and finally succumbed to it on 11th August 2010. It was a terrible blow to everyone in my family and even worse for his own - leaving behind a wife and 3-year-old son.

This post is written in loving memory of my late brother who was called to rest on 11th August 2010.  I wasn't able to post it yesterday because I felt the great pain of losing someone very dear to everyone of us. We held prayers on 30th July for two beloved men in our lives, my late father (who passed away years ago) and late brother, who had left us for a better place.

This is what my sister wrote at her facebook as a dedication to my late father and brother. I am quoting her who might had quoted it somewhere, if not her own.

"A good person will always be in memory. A better person will always be in dreams. But the best person will always be in heart. For us, you are the best persons and we will remember you till the end of our life...."

This is my prayer for both of them in Bahasa Malaysia which I'm unable to translate to English.


"Semoga Allah mencucuri rahmat ke atas roh kedua-dua allahyarham dan diletakkan di sisi orang-orang beriman. Amin."

To The Little One

This is something which I dread to say. It breaks my heart thinking of a pet which I loved most 'left' me so untimely. I have a soft spot for cats and love having them around the house. What saddens me is the passing away of my Siamese kitten (male). It happened two days ago which shocked me seeing it motionless at the front door  as though it was just sleeping. It was such a lovely kitten with white and smokey fur, blue eyes and very playful. Now, I am missing its playfulness, its purrs and above all its presence in the house.  I don't know what magic do pets bring to my life for I feel they play a vital role to fill up my bad days.  There's some kind of soothing feeling when I am able to cuddle them, stroke their furs and hear them purr. Watching them running after each other and around the house always make my day. They give unconditional love without having to judge the person I am.

This is a dedication for my Siamese kitten which now RIP.

I named you, Upa, my Siamese kitten,
Your cottony white and smokey fur,
Hold my eyes in sheer amazement,
Your blue eyes, so lovely they are,
Sometimes starring sharp at me,
When I fail to give due attention.
Your naughtiness makes my day,
You run, climb, scratch and play,
And bite me so very tenderly
but I let you do so, dear baby.

Now.....

It's only a memory when
you left me so untimely,
I lost my sanity thinking
you'd be with me everyday,
You had left for two days and
made me feel my day so grey,
It's so void without your cry,
Saying your name, my lips turn dry,
I pray you're at a place so heavenly,
The happiness of having you will
always be in my loving memory.

Image :  123greetings.com

*The picture above isn't my kitten but it looked exactly the same.  I have some problems to upload pictures from my camera, so having this picture eases so much of my pain.

In Loving Memory

A final goodbye was hard to say,
The thoughts of you forever stay,
Wish so much it didn't end that way,
How nice to be together everyday.

Days went by filled in happiness,
Thought that it would be endless,
My mind was a wee bit senseless,
How could I hold on to selfishness?

As though we were meant for each other,
High hope of loving and caring forever,
But our fates had been determined earlier,
Accepting reality in the face of fear.

Fear of losing seemed an absurdity,
To ward it off was an impossibility,
It had been destined by the Almighty,
What's left are all in sweet memory.



Memories for keeps,
Balqis
Feb 4th, 2011
Cold Friday


Image : www.buzzle.com