Right From My Heart......

I just can't help ......
feeling the darkness that befalls the night
I wish dearly there are twinkling stars above
that could be my guide in the paths ahead
Everything seems to be bleak
No matter how hard I try to think that it isn't


This is indeed a real challenge of life
For what I want it to be.....isn't as it is
Tears are pricking my eyelids
My heart fills with a burden .......
beyond description


My empathy.....right from my heart
For you, my beloved brother
I hide my sorrow....and replace it with
words of encouragement
for you to be strong enough to face
whatever comes your way


My prayers.....and everyone else's
in our big family
Are specially meant for you
We love you so dearly
that we feel every single fear,
every single anxiety....
and fear of the unknown
that you feel...


But, my dear brother
Never let your strength weakens
Don't ever let negative thoughts
be in control of you
Keep your spirit high
Let it soars as high as the sky


Think of the sun, the blue sky
Think of our family strong bond
Think of your beloved Akmal
And your 'queen' Ju
Think of the great time we share
Just think of everything nice


My dear brother,
You have a strong family support
Let us be together in tears and laughter
Lets just focus on
A recovery sooner or later
And lets not forget
It could be a trial of life
And keep on believing
that you'll be able to overcome
everything.....yes! everything
Amin

*Every single line I wrote above comes right from my heart for my dear brother who has been ill for almost a year.

October......

Time flies! And I've not been here for quite awhile! It's not that I'm indulging in too much of rendang, curry, ketupat, lemang, kuah kacang and what's not......well, it's just like any other normal day when you've got too much to handle that you hardly know how time flies that super fast! You would only realise at the end of the day that you have been going through such a hard day's work when your body ache, your head getting heavy, you feel as though your eyes are squinting, you could hardly move your legs as though been walking for miles and miles.....that's part of it.

It's really a very hectic time for me.....oops! I'm not complaining. And believe me, I feel the guilt....really guilty for not been able to update this dear blog of mine. If only it could talk, I presume it would say that it's not been well taken care of! Anyway, glad that today I'm quite free and earlier, after visiting my friend's house (raya visit), I grab my laptop....and here I am now. Actually, lots to write about but let's keep it in stages lest I run out of ideas the next time I log on!

This month is a 'happening' month....personally, that's how I feel it. October.....yes, many great events take place...to name but a few , one is the birthday of my beloved family member falls in this month...in this month, too  I would attend a big event....which is very significant.....I mean, career-wise....for it determines my future.....yes! I'm praying for the best from it.....I believe my determination and commitments all this while will defy all barriers.....for I have set a goal for it.

My icon, Hafiz Af7's raya gathering will be held in this month, too....received sms from the organisers several times telling me about it but sad to say, I won't be able to make it. However, I'm looking forward for some other events with Hafiz's presence at some other times at some other place.....who knows, I might be able to make it. And to those of you who will be attending the event...enjoy yourself and make the best out of it. Make it a memorable one!

Well, what else needs to be said....tonight I'm going to continue visiting friends' houses. Almost everyday getting invitations....free 'makan' here and there.....if only this could go on and on....hehehe. On the other hand, have to watch the BMI and ensure the ideal weight....glad that it isn't a problem with me.

Dear all, I'm signing off. Happy weekend everyone!

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri!

It's the end of the holy month of Ramadhan and tomorrow muslims will celebrate the Hari Raya Aidilfitri after fasting for a month. It has always been a joyous day for me and may I recall, when I was a little girl, the day I really enjoyed most...... dressed up my best, wearing new baju, with new hairstyle, new shoes.....everything new and spending my time with my little brothers and sisters....eating all the goodies of aidilfitri....and visiting almost every house in the kampung....getting some raya money....and in the evening would play that sparkling 'bunga api' ,the one which we could hold...just lit it and moved it around and around like a magic wand! Gone are the days cos now I'm a grown-up! Well, childhood memories will always be cherished for it comes only once in my life.

This time around, everyone in my family and in others, too, is busy with our raya chores such as  decorating the house right up to preparing all sorts of dishes for tomorrow. Needless to say, there's so much to be done but everyone is in such a very merry mood that there isn't any complaint of getting tired whatsoever! It's going to be a big family gathering for me this year cos all my siblings, from far and near, are coming back except for one of my sisters who will only be celebrating  raya until the fourth day here. On the fifth day, she'll be flying over to Manchester, England and spend another part of her raya with her family there. According to her, there's no better place than spending raya in Malaysia cos the celebration here is much more merrier than elsewhere and it's rather very 'quiet' for her in Manchester. It's a big city with many people but the raya 'mood' doesn't exist like what we have here. I couldn't agree more....

Aidilfitri is also the time when we seek forgiveness from family members and friends for any wrong doing. With this opportunity, I'd like to wish all my family members, friends and readers of this blog, Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri, Maaf Zahir Batin!

Under The Weather......

     Quite restless as though like a centipede with an athlete foot.....whatever I do seems to be wrong. Body aching and temperature is far from normal. Been feeling unwell since yesterday but today I gather enough gut to be back on my feet for certain reasons which are very important for me to settle soon and handling very important

documents which have to be

handed over to a third party for their execution.

 So, this afternoon I went over to the advocates' office armed with my two sets of documents. Upon arrival, the very sweet looking secretary intercomed her boss and I was told to wait for him in that very cold room......just couldn't bear it but things have to get done VERY SOON! There I was waiting for what I felt as though  long dragging hours (actually, it was for about ten minutes or so). My condition have made me felt that way.  Right after that, I heard footsteps and there he was, that lawyer who greeted me and said 'Hey! you look familiar to me." My god! have I ever met this guy before? I couldn't recall where and when but he was like a chatter box (indeed, he was.....good as a lawyer!) He was asking me who introduced me to go over to his firm, I said bluntly nobody....I just got hold of whatever firm I came across first as I didn't have any panel. The chat was flowing very smoothly....he being a chatter box...asked me my educational background and so on and so forth and yes....we were once in the same school but he was my senior. At that moment, I was feeling much better telling him of my intention and being a normal person and inquistive, I couldn't help getting very anxious of wanting  to know how much was my legal fee......afraid that I might get a hole in my pocket! Well, much to my relief he told me it would be 10% of my asset. That's ok.....and he promised my documents would be prepared soon and convincingly said.....that's easy to be done...Of course, easy for a pro like him who had gone through many things day in day out. Whereas a layman would blink and fumble over long sentences written in  a "lawyer's way " which sometimes fail to make us understand that really well! l'm still wondering though for that very warm reception they give thier clients.....could it be a business strategy to keep clients coming back.....Whatever it is, I for one do look for first class treatment whenever I  go to see a private doctor, a lawyer, a beautician etc etc cos I would like to get back what's worth paying for. Glad to say that they treat clients really well .....that's how it should be for businesses to go on and survive in the ever competing life.

09/09/09......

The dates....some auspicious, some important, some memorable, some are not to be forgotten.....the bottom line, what's so significant about it? It all depends on how we look at it or more to our very own experiences of what we are going through on certain specific dates such as today.

The past few days, I have been thinking of today's date. It's such a lovely number....triple 9....the odd number 9...triple 9 when multiplied equals 27. There's nothing special when I talk about this number. It's just that it sounds good when it's written down or when I say it. No doubt, it does carry myriads of meanings for those who want to make today's date as a very memorable one for certain celebrations.... such as getting engaged or tie the knots. Whatever it is, it all depends on how we want it to be remembered as a very significant date in our life or whether it's the date that brings happiness or sadness....Hard to predict, right?

Personally, today isn't a good day for me ...... a sad one, I'd say. Most of us have experience various stages of life.....a mixture of what I'd prefer to say, the bitter sweet of it. But it's beyond our capacity to ward off the 'bitter' side of it as it's so unpredictable..... But what keeps us strong is the faith in the almighty for whatever crosses our paths has a blessing in disguise. So, let's count or blessings....whenever we lose what we love most....we get something even more better than what we used to have....behind every cloud, there's a silver lining....there's a light at the end of the tunnel......isn't that so inspiring to think of the positive side of it? It would make us more matured and thankful of what we have after toiling through gruelling moments. So, keep counting your blessings!

Happy Weekend!

Saturday! Yes...it's a day I always wait for cos it's weekend when I can let my hair down after 5 days of hard work....not complaining, just saying it! Today, I can pamper myself ...... no hush and rush for work , wake up at whatever time I want, listen to Hafiz's songs or the chirping birds out there among the trees, watch the sunset later , go to Tanjung Batu Beach and watch the big tankers out there or simply smell the roses in my garden for it gives me sensations of relaxation and well-being. That's quite a long list but I will pick the best among all.

Among the favourite spots my family and I use to go to during weekend is the Tanjung Batu Beach. I appreciate nature so much so, I find that it's a breathtaking place where I can listen to and watch the waves roll onto the beach besides watching the casuarina trees swaying gracefully when blown gently by the sea breeze producing some kind of soft sentimental sound pleasant to the ears. I used to look far at the horizon and wonder what's that at the other side of it......mind visualizing a place where there's really peace and tranquility ....... so calm which will bring peace to my mind, so heavenly.... that's what I dream of .....

Well, back to reality, today I feel the burden have been lifted off my shoulder for most of what I did the past few days have been completed. I can heave a sigh of relief, though I know many more are to come....that's the fact cos life has to go on.... And it's Ramadhan and I'm fasting....so, I thought of preparing some special dishes today. As I'm at home, ample time could be spent in the kitchen trying my cooking skills! Sometimes what I cook don't turn up the way it should be and for that family members are complaining....sorry!

And I didn't tend to my garden for quite sometime. The last time when I was extremely busy was last month during haze. Plants have to be watered everyday including my rambutan trees. Despite my effort, it's saddening to see the rambutan fruits turn brownish. Poor me! Right now, I'm thinking of the flowers and plants ... and they are all screaming for my attention!

A Hectic Week......

Phew.....it's Wednesday! How time flies! This week, I am going through hoards of workload.......hey! stay cool....I say to myself. Stay focused and do your work smartly and in accordance to priority......instilling a fighting spirit in myself! :) Nothing beats the pleasure and relief I get once everything's accomplished. No matter how much time I spend on it and even though to the extent of sacrificing my precious moments of enjoying good tv shows, the immense satisfaction of getting it done is indescribable.

Well, here I am now trying to put my mind together and taking off a little bit of my time to update the blog. I guess, at one point in life, one has to bear with whatever situation one has when it's work-related. Recalling the time when my friends and I attended interviews..... and what's still very clear on my mind is the so very 'commited' answer of how we would oblige to be assigned to work wherever on earth and as long as it's under the sun! Cool, eh? So, I live up to my word....

Sometimes, the inner child inside me would say......look at that cat (my cat, in particular!) lazing around.....makan, makan, makan only......such a a relax and slow paced life......isn't it nice to be like that cat?? Hehehe...I'm a little bit carried away.....Well, in comparison with human, animals only have the needs of here and right now. There's no tomorrow, no next month or next year. See the difference....that's what make human so special...... So, I would like to be as myself (not necessarily to purr...:P ) and what's to be done has to be done.....

Cherished Moments...

Hafiz AF7

I didn't know what was I up to this year AF7's season. I was truly falling head over heels with the superb performance of this 19-year-old. The much awaited weekly concert ,which was broadcasted by a private tv station, was never missed since March till May. It was all for a reason.......to watch him sing in that reality show and much to the satisfaction of viewers, he sang superbly most of the time.

A natural-born talent, I'd say. He had captured the hearts of audiences, young and old alike. As viewers were able to vote the contestants they favoured most by sending sms, I was among the thousands who didn't miss the chance to do so. It was quite an amount but worth spending when eventually he became the champion of AF7! That was one of the most cherished moments for those who have become fans of this aspiring star. It's about 3 months now after the glorious night of being chosen by Malaysians as the champ of AF7 and he's doing well, always on the go. He has to his credit the first album which was launched on 14 July this year. Congrats!

I got the chance to meet him in person during the Meet The Fans Session & High Tea at Eastwood Valley Golf and Country Club, Miri on 8 August '09. If I didn't turn up it would be a regret of a life time! Fans, children and elders, turned up in large group and filled the ballroom. It was such a sweet moment for being able to watch his live performance and most importantly, able to talk to him even though for a short while. Flashes from cameras were everywhere and everyone was given equal share of having snapshots with him.

On a personal account, he looked so awesome that day! And of course, he is blessed with good looks and good talent. That's a good balance! It's not surprising that his good attitude have won the hearts of many people. He treated everyone equally well and so warmly. That's what most would expect from him and he had it.

As the popular saying goes, one for the album. Here I was with Hafiz's mom (on the left). She's really a very nice and friendly lady. Thank you ma'am for that little talk with you and thank you for being so warm towards all of us. Such a moment will always be cherished forever and to Hafiz, all the best to you superboy! May successes be with you always! And remember, you have strong fans out here!

Little Tiger In The Garden....

It jumps here and there. It even sprints for a bird at the backyard. Its golden fur can easily be recognised even if it's hiding among the bushes. Its playfulness always make up my day. A little bit 'fierce' cos doesn't seem to be very friendly when sometimes it snarls at me even during feeding time. It only wants to eat but doesn't want to be a friend, sometimes! The hang out place is behind my kitchen. That's where it can smell the food I cook! It will always stay there till I feed it.

This is one of my pets. How wonderful it is looking and admiring at this cute little cat. Looks like a shy little kid or 'malu-malu kucing' but it might be prudent not to scare it because its snarl is enough to make one jumps up! That's why it's called a Little Tiger.

Salam and Hi Everyone!

Actually, in the first place I didn't know what to write or talk about when blogging. I'm truly an amateur who just start to blog on Friday 21 August 2009. It all started after getting some sort of encouragement from a friend whom I met at Hafiz Af7' s blog who said that I should start a blog of my own. (Bravo, Hafiz's fans, we are united! ) Thank you, Abet. Here I am now slowly adapting myself to the blogging world. There are many things which I need to learn and right now, I feel as though I'm in the pre-school of blogging! :) As a beginner, how I create this blog is really very basic. Anyway, I need time and space to improve and work on it.

All this while, I'm an ardent reader of other blogs which I find interesting. There are times when I drop comments in the comment box especially when I find that the entry is intriguing or simply, as Malaysians say, 'menyibuk' giving some thoughts and positive comments about it.

I love reading and writing besides enjoying good music and entertainment like Akademi Fantasia and lots more. Regarding writing, all are kept to myself, I should say. There are times when I scribble here and there whatever comes to my mind but as I said, it's not shared with others. My writings are simple and easy to be understood just by anyone. I have this habit of jotting down whatever caught my mind wherever I'm, be it in the seminar or what's aired over tv and radio programmes and other medias.

A little note about myself. I am at the moment residing in Bintulu, once popularly known as 'Belacan town' for its high quality belacan (proud to say that! hehehe). Yes, that's true.....even those who come from Semenanjung and elsewhere acknowledge that. Mind you, the price is soaring high now. Well, a little bit going off-track there. Anyway, back to myself, I come from a mixed background both from my mom's and dad's sides. Local mixed only lah! I have a close knit family who are always by my side through thick and thin. That's what a family is for!

I studied up to a tertiary education and I have a good job now which I enjoy so much though there are times when I feel that it's really bugging me! Normal work life, right? I enjoy good friendship and it's unconditional. So, be my friends!

Long Lost Buddy

My buddy (in blazer) and I

What a great day! Reminiscing the good old days with a long lost friend whom I met again yesterday. So many things to talk about since the days we left college. Feel that it's a friendship to be treasured and never to be lost again cos it's so priceless. Thanks God, you've enable me to see one of the best people in the world.

It was a great surprise when I bumped into her yesterday when we attended a 2-day course organised by our HQ. At first sight, I could hardly recognise who she was cos I felt as if it had been ages since we last met. The last time, if I could recall, was a couple of years after our college days. Then, we went separate paths and lost contact. Only heard about her again from another friend. At that time, I was furthering my studies at the university and got to know that this friend of mine was furthering hers, too. It was fated that we were to meet again when out of the blue we bumped into each other again. We were so overwhelmed with happiness that made us speechless for awhile. It was a moment to be cherished forever.

Today, she left for another destination. A very emotional parting when she shed tears before heading off her journey. I wish we would be able to spend more time together but both of us have commitments, career wise. Nevertheless, I wish this sweet moment would come again and I wish many good things for her and for me.