Oct 27, 2010

Into The Emptiness

Melancholy cry,
Breaks the stillness of the night,
Heart falling apart.


Cold night gripping tight,
the poor, depressed fragile soul,
Depriving warm love.


*A try on Haiku.

Balqis
past midnight
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Posted by Balqis DBJ at Wednesday, October 27, 2010

21 comments:

  1. MoonomoOctober 27, 2010 at 1:01 AM

    I like the second part! "Depriving warm love" - Great!

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  2. Balqis DBJOctober 27, 2010 at 1:59 AM

    @Moon, thanks for being the first one to read and comment.

    When I connect the words, it's about sadness. So, concluding in a better way of getting warm love.

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  3. YGNDOctober 27, 2010 at 2:09 AM

    That was not a try on Haiku, that IS Haiku. So sad but beautiful. Great job. You and Moon are such fast learners. I am proud of you :)

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  4. Balqis DBJOctober 27, 2010 at 2:14 AM

    @YGND, thanks a lot, dear. You inspire me to write!

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  5. AnonymousOctober 27, 2010 at 7:25 AM

    Sadness in the soul as a certainty. Something that grows from melancholy!

    I would like to be able to express those feelings so beautifully!

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  6. Christine L. AndreOctober 27, 2010 at 11:10 AM

    Good one..I can feel the emptiness.

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  7. Jolly PrincessOctober 27, 2010 at 1:35 PM

    Hmmm... no like sadness. I prefer the other post before this one. After all, I am Jolly Princess. Nice poem though. :)

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  8. Balqis DBJOctober 27, 2010 at 2:18 PM

    @Tony, life teaches us a lot. It's filled with sadness and happiness and in between there are some other unexplained emotions.

    @Christine, the appreciation of the figurative words will make us feel it.

    @Princess, sorry..I'd like to make everyone happy all the times but dear, it's far beyond my reach. Thanks for the visit! :)

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  9. The Book of Shadows (The Dark Side)October 27, 2010 at 4:54 PM

    Hey sis.. Sorry, I am late.. Yeah, I had a bad fall and am having a sprained ankle now since Monday so hadn't been around much as I cant sit for long..
    Anyway, wow, this is a nostalgic poem for me - with a slight shade of grey (the sad part of it).. Good take on Haiku... I haven't try it though.. Maybe one day, I will.. ;) *Hug*

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  10. Balqis DBJOctober 27, 2010 at 5:36 PM

    @Krislin, Better late then never! Hope you'll recover soon. Miss you!

    Give it a shot! I know you could do it!

    Will check out your blogs later. Got something to tell u.

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  11. Balqis DBJOctober 27, 2010 at 5:36 PM

    *then=than

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  12. catOctober 27, 2010 at 6:00 PM

    I'm with Jolly Princess. No like sadness too. But the haiku is oh so good! Well done, Balqis!

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  13. Balqis DBJOctober 27, 2010 at 7:10 PM

    @Yileen, yeah, no one likes it but it's part of life!

    Thanks for dropping by. You make my day! :)

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  14. ZezebelOctober 28, 2010 at 10:03 AM

    Never try write Haiku before.
    Great job sis. Maybe you can teach me how to do this.

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  15. jyotsnaOctober 28, 2010 at 1:59 PM

    Oh ! full of sadness :-( but nicely composed/ expressed :-)

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  16. The Book of Shadows (The Dark Side)October 28, 2010 at 5:13 PM

    :) Saw that, sis.. How can I ever thank you... Thanks for the support always.. :) *HUGGGGGG*

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  17. Balqis DBJOctober 28, 2010 at 6:53 PM

    @Zezebel, no problem, we can learn together.:)

    @jyotsna, thanks! :)

    @my sis Krislin, the sisterly love between both of us is the most valuable thing. You deserve it and my support is always for you.:)

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  18. ANURAGSAYZNovember 1, 2010 at 3:08 PM

    I can relate to the last three lines.....
    Depriving love...fragile heart and clod nyt... a perfect blend...

    Great post...
    happy blogging

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  19. Balqis DBJNovember 2, 2010 at 1:02 AM

    @Anuragsayz, thanks a lot!

    Happy blogging to u too! :)

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  20. fionaNovember 2, 2010 at 2:51 PM

    Balqis, thanks, happy blogging to u too..

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  21. Balqis DBJNovember 3, 2010 at 1:04 AM

    @fiona, thanks for your visit. :)

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