(i)
a
little gesture
travels
in the space of time
my
thoughts, my wishes
(ii)
upon
the first song
as
first light breaks in slowly
first
thought flies to you
(iii)
a
smile, the sweetest
the
messenger of warm thoughts
onto
you, they flow
with
sincerity,
balqis
Oct28'12
So beautiful, filled with emotion, a thought so special left me wondering to whom it flowed to :)
ReplyDeleteI can't blame you for wondering, Zunnur. You make me smile cos I know you're a poet yourself and surely you know much poetic expressions.
DeleteNow, let's talk a bit. You know, when a writer writes something, it isn't necessarily referring to what s/he goes through but more on life's experiences; of all the emotions we could think of and create something out of them. In this case, the thought is so special, so I'm trying my best to express it in a way which you mentioned 'beautiful'. You're boosting my creativity and surely, I'll try to write better next time!
I appreciate your comment so much. It's really good to know your kind words as a response to this Haiku.
Thank you so much! :)
Salam Balqis,
DeleteThere's nothing wrong with your poem, its just perfect. Different people have different views on writing poems. Some dislike poems that leave question marks while others adore them. Some poets think that when a poem leaves us wondering more about its subject, it has done its job and qualifies as a good poem.
When I express emotion, I always leave something for the readers to wonder about. I'm so used to it and I read lots of poems of this sort. Everyone has their own way of writing and that adds colors to the world of writing. So when I wrote "left me wondering" in my earlier comment, I wasn't actually trying to point out a drawback, sorry that I didn't put my comment properly.
I liked your writings especially the one about friendship which you wrote some time back. Reading your posts helps me to improve my English as I'm not really good at it actually.
:)
Wassalam Zunnur. Thank you so much for your comments. I agree with you on how people perceive poetry works. There are many ways of explicating it depending on their understanding.
DeleteOh! It's alright for what you had said in the previous comments. I like it! I also don't feel anything wrong with it. I made some explanations because some people (not you) used to ask me who's that lucky person you mentioned in your work. I have no answer cos whatever I wrote are merely for the passion in writing. I try to write differently at different times, putting myself into many states of emotions; sadness, happiness, anger, moodiness, frustration, some touching on love and care..etc..to mention just a few. It's more like exploring into creative writing.
Actually, I understood what you meant previously and I was telling you I smiled because my Haiku made the readers wonder! You had written your comments clearly and I thank you again for that. :)
Your kind words are the encouragement for me to write more! If it's really qualified as a good poem, then I'm so honored and many thanks for your appreciation in my work. It means a lot!
Thank you, too, for taking your time reading some old posts. My poem "Friendship" has been the most viewed for quite some time already and it is still at the top notch.
I'm blushing, can't help it, cos what you said is beyond my worth. My English is no better than yours. I write in a very simple way. You know, every time I'm at your blog, I read the quality writings there and your English is superb! Both you and I are learners/users of English as a second language. I'll take your words as a compliment and again, I'd like to say it means a lot to me. :)
Thank you so much for commenting again. I want you to know that I visited your blog and read your posts but couldn't comment.
Have a great day! :)
Salam Balqis,
DeleteI'm happy to have this conversation with you. I'm sorry I could not respond earlier as I was sick for the past few weeks and refrained from the computer. I was happy to read your reply and your kind words. I'm also glad that you actually understood what I meant in my earlier comment. Sincerely speaking, your poems are beautiful.
Thank you for your review at Bloggers.com. I was having trouble with my blog comment box and some of other bloggers could not leave their comments too. From the feedback I received, apparently, it only happened on Firefox, Chrome and Safari. I've changed some of the comment options and hopefully its working fine now.
Thank you again for your inspiring words.
You're most welcome! Thank you for your support. :)
DeleteYou know, without anyone reading and criticizing my works, I'm nothing...it's like a small boat sailing a vast ocean and helplessly being hit by storms and big waves!
A very simple image...yet beautiful
ReplyDeleteplus meaningful thoughts!
Perfect combination!
Thank you so much, Ric, for your kindness. It means a lot to me. :)
DeleteBB, your words captures the heart- and all its belong!!
ReplyDeleteThat echoes sadness, eagerness and many more- Its been so long time- so glad to read your trio! :))
Hi Omo! I'm so happy to see you again. It's been a long time and you know, I just can't say in words how much I miss all friends who used to be here once. You bring joy to me today. :)
DeleteThank you so much for taking your time reading this trio. Your kind words are really a booster for me to attempt more on Haiku writing. If this trio could evoke some feelings, then I'm so glad to know it.
Thank you again! :))
Thank you, BB.
DeleteI forgot to mention, this trio is a masterpiece of your. :))
You pamper me! Thank you so much, dear friend. :))
Deleteoooo I love it!!! How do you write Haiku?? Ok, I'll admit I've never understood the mechanics of it! Not understood such poems themselves. But when I read this one - I got it. Please do let me know how you create Haiku.
ReplyDeleteHi Chhavi! Welcome to my blog! Thank you so much for your kind words. Please, surf for Haiku sites for more informations.
DeleteFYI, I'm still trying to write Haiku. I love its simplicity. :)